Wow, I’m honoured that you would spend six months of your life crafting this glorious comeback.

But I worry, has the construction of this witty retort taken over your life? Is your living room a mess of post it notes and red twine wrapped around pins? Is there a wire mesh trash can filled to the brim with scrunched up balls of paper, while an open bottle of scotch watches on from under a lamp? Is there a whiteboard with comeback candidates hastily scribbled then crossed out? Something about my parents conceiving me on a roller coaster, scratched out with TOO CONFUSING written in chalk pushed so hard that it snapped and left a scar on the board?

And how frustrating that, after six months of polishing this spectacular verbal rabbit chop, you saw it there on the page, beheld its glory, but at the last minute knew that somehow, “stop writing about things you clearly don’t and won’t ever understand” wasn’t quite right. So you came back and edited it to “stop promoting cryptocurrency scams like Dash”.

But I think nothing shows your dedication and attention to detail more so than the fact that, in the first sentence, you came back and changed “obviously” to “clearly”. Yes I think that was the perfect move. I think it really make the whole insult more engaging.

Nice work, Costanza.